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The Loneliness in Losing a Life Partner

August 1, 2019

To say one “feels lonely” after losing their life partner is an understatement, especially if you have been happily married for many years. In time, however, you may find yourself at a crossroads. On one hand you can’t imagine life with another partner while on the other you hand you can’t bear this loneliness. You want a partner again. 

Where your adult children are concerned, good preparation can literally keep your family from falling apart. Hard as it may be, talk to them and share how you feel and what you are missing. As much as you love your family and as much as they love you, their love cannot satisfy what you need. Help your children understand that you are not trying to replace their mom or dad, but that you may want to have someone to eat dinner with or a bridge partner again.

As soon as the thought of dating enters your mind, before you bring the thought to life with a real person, think about how a new relationship will land with your adult children. Consider both the emotional impact and the financial concerns that might be raised. Make an appointment with your attorney and talk about how a second marriage would impact your estate. Family concerns about money or the inheritance will only make things more difficult if you begin to date. We’ve all heard stories, so get your affairs in order BEFORE there is a person you care about and share any changes you make to your estate with your children.

If possible, consider your pace. If you slow down just a little bit and really enjoy the dating part of a relationship, it will give your children some time to get used to the idea of you dating again. It can help everyone adjust to the changing family dynamic that occurs when a new person is added to the mix. Just as the family dynamic changed when your children dated and/or married, it will change again if you start dating.

Communicate, talk about how you feel, and if you decide to date, go slow. Take care of those money matters early on so that any changes will not be seen as the fault of the new person in your life.

Bissler & Sons Funeral Home and Crematory has served families in Kent, Ohio, and all of Portage County since 1913. The company transitioned ownership in 2018 when Rick Bissler retired and arranged to merge his family’s funeral home with the Billow family’s funeral homes, who carry on the tradition of high quality funeral, burial, memorial and cremation services. Their privately owned and operated crematory ensures that loved ones never leave their professional care. Visit bisslerandsons.com to learn more.

What Are Burial Vaults and Grave Liners and Why Do I Have to Buy Them?

February 4, 2025
When saying goodbye to someone you love, you have a multitude of decisions to make. Some you might be prepared for, while other questions are new to you. One topic that many people are unfamiliar with is the concept of burial vaults and grave liners, which you may have to have in your loved one’s final resting place.

Food and Funerals: The Comfort of Sharing a Meal

February 4, 2025
Food not only nourishes the body but also comforts the soul, making it a significant part of funeral traditions. Offering food signifies care and supports the healing journey during such tough times.

Understanding Funeral Costs: A Guide to Planning with Care

January 8, 2025
When the time comes to think about funeral arrangements, one of the first questions many of us have is, "How much will it cost?" It’s natural to look for a straightforward answer during such an emotionally charged time. However, much like finding the perfect car, the cost of a funeral varies widely depending on personal choices and specific needs.

What Is the Purpose of Embalming?

January 8, 2025
Embalming can be a controversial topic. Some people are opposed to it, whether due to personal or religious reasons, but for others, embalming is an important part of starting their grief journey and getting a chance to say goodbye to the person they love.

Dressing for a Funeral: Comfort, Respect, and What to Wear

January 8, 2025
Attending a funeral is one of those things that makes everyone pause, not just because of the emotional weight, but also the big question: "What do I wear?" Let’s discuss.

Embracing Family in Funeral Planning

January 8, 2025
When it comes time to say goodbye to a loved one, the focus of the funeral often naturally falls on the family. It's the people who loved and knew the deceased best—spouses, children, grandchildren, friends, and even coworkers—who come together to remember and honor their life.

What’s the Difference Between a Family and Community Columbarium?

December 3, 2024
When people lose a loved one, many take comfort in knowing that there’s a place they can go to be with them. Cemeteries offer a location where loved ones can gather to be with those who are no longer with them in everyday life. In many ways, choosing to be buried or interred in a cemetery is a gift for those still living as it gives them a place to find you, knowing that you’re never really too far away.

When Someone Dies, Someone Else Feels Lonely

December 3, 2024
The loneliness that accompanies the death of someone we care about is complex and individual. For those who, for many years, woke every morning alongside a husband or wife, it is strange to open your eyes and realize you’re alone. In the early days of grief, the void that is left when a life partner dies can feel like a black hole with no way out.

I’m Lonely: When is Too Soon to Start Dating?

November 12, 2024
The answer to this question depends on who you ask. Queen Victoria famously mourned Prince Albert by wearing black for the remainder of her life, forty years. The fictional character Scarlet O’Hara in the novel Gone With the Wind scandalized her peers by dancing with a bachelor at a charity event while “still in black.”

After the Death of a Spouse: 10 Things to Do BEFORE You Start Dating

November 12, 2024
Slow down and commit to investing some time in getting ready to date. A little preparation work will help you protect your safety, have a more pleasurable dating experience, and possibly avoid heartbreak.
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